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Sunday, January 22, 2012

Boundless - Take responsibilty for your dating life, the third option

As a thinking urbanite, I find quite a bit of Boundless's articles to be frustrating. And so it goes for Biblical Dating: An Introduction by Scott Croft.

The way the article is written makes it seem that there is nothing in between so-called "Biblical Dating" and "Modern Dating." Boundless tries to make it seem that focusing on courtship under the careful supervision of Mom, Dad, and pastoral staff is the only way to fly. There is alot of ground in between the two.

I can see how many might think of "Biblical Dating" as the way to avoid the wounds of the modern world. However, it is just as harmful to deal with no one ever wanting to get to know you until they think they want to pursue marriage. It means no coffee dates, no hanging out, and no movies with guy friends. UGH! It's ridiculous. Why?

Every little thing a person says or does is still about figuring out whether or not to offer marriage without even knowing the person.

Take some responsibility. Just because family, father, or church are not involved in your coffee date, it doesn't mean you can't get to know someone and see if they aren't worth getting to know before making a decision about marriage. What ends up happening with many of my aquintences is that they avoid any relationships at all with the opposite sex because they feel like they have to know if they want to get married to them before even having a cup of coffee with them.

And acquinatance of mine who grew up in Colorado had parents who quickly jumped on the bandwagon of betrothal as the right way for their children to interact with the opposite sex. What my friend has actually seen is that many of his friends who used this method before marriage have serious problems in their relationships.

I'm entertaining a series on "Dating Done Right" - a guide for the rest of us.

Thanks for reading! Please leave a comment! (Thanks also for lurking. I don't allow anonymous comments. SavvySingleChristian@yahoo.com)

1 comment:

C. L. Evans said...

Great post. Dating for Christian singles can be a bit complicated and frustrating if you don't have an open mind. The most important thing for me was being led by the Spirit of God. That lead me to do some things a bit untraditional but nothing was against God's Word or will. Different doesn't always mean bad.

Thanks for writing. I look forward to reading more of your blog!