I thought I lost my tape recorder and I prayed really hard for you to help me find it. I hadn't seen it in a week and was pretty sure I lost it. Well, after one of these prayers, I looked under my new signed copy of Stuff White People Like and there it was, buried. I had looked in that bag before. How did I not see it? What a relief. I wish it were like that all the time, but it's not...
When I was having some legal troubles, I prayed really hard, and it seemed like you heard me. You answered my prayer and things got better. There are still some stressful things going on, but that thing was huge.
But I have been praying ferverently for a boyfriend/husband and it's like you are completely deaf. I'm terrified now that I will never find someone who likes me. I see men who I think are amazing and they never like me.
People tell me how they suffer to attend church without their non-beliving husbands. Really? How about with no husband at all and not much hope of ever finding one? I would trade with those women in a hot minute. I've always gone to church by myself and sat in pews on my own. It'd be nice to have someone to go home to.
I don't fit in with worldly guys. And I don't know why the church guys don't even see me. My girlfriends reassure me that I'm pretty. I don't see it. How can I be pretty if the guys never like me? When people compliment me, I'm shocked. I have attractive qualities? Why don't the good men see them and ask me out? If they do see them, why don't they ask me out?
I have this crush on a man who I think would be great for me - or someone like him. If someone else came along, I would certainly give that up, but there isn't anyone. No one. Not at all. Just the bad ones who I tell to go away.
Are you really there? Why don't you do something? I'm losing faith in You because you just don't seem to care.