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Thursday, September 23, 2010

Too Much Information

Oh dear. Sometimes you find things out about people that you didn't want to know...but then...sometimes you're glad you know so you can just move on. Here is the followup to dating online being a waste of time.

I had met someone a year ago and spent a considerable time with her getting to know here. Not to forget that we were intimate few times without protection. Since I cannot feel and enjoy intercourse with protection, I dont use it. However, I am really selective about who gets intimate with me. So anyways, after 2 months I found out that my girlfriend apparently was dating 2 other guys on the side and was probably physically intimate with them too. I felt like crap and hopefully you can understand that. I am not jealous, just careful. I love talking to you and would love to talk to you more but you seem way too busy. We have been emailing back and forth for a month or even more and havent met still.

Nick



My response:

Dear Nick,
I was very sick.

Wow. That's alot of pain to go through.

You should be selective, as am I. I am also cautious about who I meet at all. I was meeting a female friend the day you called and the timing was off. You did not try again. We certainly didn't know each other's schedules, and I have to say someone who sends a goofy picture is often hiding something or not serious. It's a really big turnoff and made you look like a player. I tried to coax something more from you but it did not work. You then accused me of something I would never do.

I appreciate your sharing and I'm sorry you went through that. Because of such things I would not be intimate without condoms since I have only had intercourse with 2 people. Even WITH condoms, there are some STDs such as herpes which can be passed. It's something I prefer not to share with men since they usually don't believe it and expect things to go very fast. For others, an inexperienced woman is a big turn off because for them, relationships are mainly about sex. Perhaps if people didn't move so fast, there wouldn't be so many hurt feelings out there. Like I said, I am looking for my sweetheart. Someone who would put love and care in the mix. Soulmate sounds like looking for perfection, I'm not looking for perfection. I'm looking for a sweetheart.

I hope you have been tested. Yo might want to reevalute your position on condoms as I hear there are women who will lie and say they are on the pill and the pill doesn't always work correctly.

I wouldn't normally say this either, but the pill made me very ill when I tried it, so I do not take it. I think there is no use in meeting, though I am not too busy. I do things by myself alot like seeing classical and rock concerts. I have to keep busy or I will be sad that I do not have a sweetheart.



Now people, I know there will be two ways of thinking about this.

2 people? Practically a virgin.

2 people??? Not married??? What a whore!!!

For the people who think I'm too inexperienced:
I can't help it that I want to know that someone has a heart before I sleep with them. I can't help it that I want to know that they care about me. I can't help it that I want to know that we have some real potential. What I really want is to wait for marriage. Everyone has needs, and before I care about meeting a man's "needs", he has to care about meeting my needs.


For the Christians:
The first man forced himself on me when I was a very naive 18 year old. The second man, I was very far from the Lord and most secular people view sex as a natural part of a relationship. We waited five months between getting to know each other and meeting his children. However, that relationship had some issues beyond that that I was not emotionally ready to handle like his children really hating me and him still seeing his ex-girlfriend. He said I was just being immature and jealous but then he married her. Once I went back to being a Christian, I have not felt strongly enough about anyone to even be tempted, really. I might feel tempted if I felt like they actually cared about me.

This is sort of why I keep my blog anonymous. I want to be able to at least be somewhat honest about things.

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