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Friday, September 10, 2010

The 5 Cs for Finding Mr. Right (When Love Ends, Part 2)

There was another part of the book I really liked. One was the idea that hard time will come whether you are single or married and having a hope-filled heart is essential no matter what. Seriously, it's true. "Just hang on, suffer well..."

I've often told people the issue is not perfection before marriage but that you need to have something to your relationship to help weather the storm. Here is the breakdown of these mysterious 5 Cs:
1. Christian (duh)
2. Communication (you have to like each other.)
3. Character (personality, integrity)
4. Chemistry (you have to be attracted to the person.)
5. Calling (are you called to marry this person. I suppose this comes down to destiny and purpose.)

Let's give a Savvy example of the above. I went on a date from online this evening. He was a perfect gentleman. He was very likeable. We had very interesting conversation. He seemed to be very nice and genuine. He seemed interested in me. All systems are go, right?

Hold on just a second.

1. He is not Christian.
4. And I wasn't attracted to him AT ALL. I'm 5'2" and I think he was about my same height. I thought I might break him as he is smaller than I am.
5. And then I thought about calling...I feel called to work on an interesting project with him, called to be a friend. But girlfriend? Marriage? I'm not feeling it.

Was I nice about it? Absolutely. But if I see him again, I will have to make it clear that it's only as friends.

At least he is not married. That's the other thing she says to make sure of.
This is why I like the book. It's not dealing with laundry lists or traits or perfection, it's dealing with reality.

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