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Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Dude, I Hate Your Mom

Swing is moving. He will really be going back home to live in his parents' basement and be a rogue game programmer. Moving is usually the end of a friendship--especially when one of the parties is moving to Nebraska. It's kind of OK since I've been feeling like we only became friends because I forced the issue. Swing is really hard to get to know. I've met lots of friends' parents, but Swing's Mom is one I will never forget.

Savvy: Dude, I think your mom totally hates me.
Swing: What makes you say that?
Savvy: Oh, gee, maybe it was when I said that I sprained my ankle and she said she always looks down to make sure she doesn't trip on anything because she sprained her ankle. And then she razzed me for about an hour about all the things I should try to do to meet someone and talked about how she met your dad when she least expected it--in college at some beer drinking party. If course it happens when you least expect it in college.
Swing: Well...
Savvy: I guess it doesn't really matter since we aren't dating.
Savvy: She told me to try wearing a burqua. Dude, what's up with that?
Savvy: Um, so did you get everything done?

I really hope that isn't the last time I see Swing, but now that I'm off all of the meds I was taking, I think I will manage OK. There was always a barrier there. Maybe it's called being a grownup. Friendships as an adult are different than those you had in undergrad--before divorce, before you lose your first real job...before alot of things. I could see that there were issues. Then again, if I WERE dating Swing, she wouldn't have said those things because I would have been dating him. She would just hate me to herself and tell him later. And yet, Swing is his own worst enemy when it comes to dating. Every time he likes someone, he comes up with reasons why it would never work. Then he complains, You're doing way better than I am. At least you have guys interested in you and asking you out. Um kind of. I guess. He has some real health issues he needs to deal with. He is diabetic and takes horse pills for it. When I was last over there and we sat on a bench talking, the mosquitoes found his blood sugar quite tasty. They didn't touch me--perhaps they were male mosquitoes. (I can't even get a date with a male mosquito? Not even a nibble? What's up with that?) I'd hate to see him get West Nile on top of everything else. I wonder what the future will bring for him. Moving back home is not all it's cracked up to be--especially when talking to potential dates.

Swing's Mom was the inspiration for Advice-be-gone.


chloe said...

"Swing is moving. He will really be going back home to live in his parents' basement and be a rogue game programmer. This is usually the end of a friendship."

Savvy, aren't you living with your parents now? How is Swing's new situation "usually the end of a friendship"? Isn't that a bit hypocritical?

SavvyD said...

The end of the friendship part is the moving part. I will change that now to "Moving is usually the ned of a friendship." It had nothing to do with him now going back to live with his parents.

SavvyD said...

I realized my detergent was Citronella scented and got this interesting remark about the male mosquitoes not biting me from Girl and City:

Citronella scented detergent? Seriously? They have that? I want some! I always get bitten by TONS of mosquitoes when I go camping :(