Savvy: Really? Can't I? Why not get to know me first to find out what kind of girl I am.
Guy: I didn't know, I'm sorry.
Nowadays they don't feel the NEED to know. Getting to know someone takes time. They just feel the NEED to get your clothes (and theirs) off RIGHT NOW. I asked a man why this is. It's a shocking philosphy.
Savvy: I don't get it. Do guys think we are all sluts?
Dude: Actually, yes.
Savvy: That's terrible. There's so many of us that aren't.
Dude: There are so many of you that are.
Savvy: So is that why guys are so impatient?
Dude: It depends.
Savvy: On what?
Dude: Whether or not the girl is a virgin. If she's a virgin, we'll wait. If she's not, we won't.
Savvy: Oh. That's completely disheartening... Why is that?
Dude: Cause if the other guy didn't have to wait, why should we?
Savvy: Oh, so just because a girl did it once, she has to do it with every guy up front? That's disgusting.
Savvy: I've learned that if I guy isn't willing to wait or if he's in any kind of a hurry that it's not about you. It's just a need that they're trying to fulfill. I'm one of those girls that would have been much happier about 50 years ago.
Dude: I think that's true for men too. We don't like it any more than you do. But there are alot of people who are fine with how things are. They get what they want and move on without regret.
When I have conversations like that, I feel a sense of doom. It's no wonder that guys treat us so badly--even Christian guys have succumbed to this philosophy. Thanks alot Sex and the City and other stupid television shows for depicting women who are smart in their careers but dumb enough to have sex without discussing contraception, STDs, commitment or even getting to know someone. With so little respect for the human body and soul, it's no wonder that so many marriages fail.
I got this comment from a reader:
Anonymous said...There are so many problems with having sex early in the relationship--if the girl is willing to have sex early on, don't wonder that she cheats on you when the opportunity arises. The next question--are you really worth it? Are YOU really worth risking STDs or pregnancy? Are YOU really offering a decent relationship? Are YOU just playing around? How does a decent girl who both desires and offers quality know the difference? Personally, I haven't met anyone who I thought was ready enough for a relationship or that I was in love with or who I sensed was in love with me or that I was MARRIED to in order to truly consider that option. But I have met men who treated me like a whore or tried to seduce me early on as if they were entitled. That's the part I object to.
I'm a guy and you are right just cause a girl sleeps with me doesnt mean it will lead to a relationship.
However, if a girl does not have sex then there is zero percent chance of a relationship. I think sex should be part of any healthy relationship and most (all) of my guy friends feel the same way. That is my opinion and if you choose not to have sex thats fine and I hope things work out for you. We all make our own decisions.
Hey anon, I get that. It's just a question of timing. I wrote about that and will publish it in a few days time. How long would you wait to get to know someone before hopping in the sack? A day? A week? A month? 2 months? Waiting and unwilling are two different things.