I had lunch with Chris just yesterday, my ex-boyfriend from over the holidays. We had fun. We talked, we laughed. As we did so, I remembered what I had found so attractive about him and yet so unnattractive about him. He said he finally went to confession after a long respite...
Savvy: SO what did you confess?
Chris: Well, I had another fling.
Chris: Yeah, just a one night thing and I never heard from her again.
Hmmm...this is a pattern with him. That puts him at 29 sexual partners. Gross.
Savvy: So are you seeing anyone special, or is everyone special?
Chris: Haha, well, there is this one girl, but we haven't even kissed yet.
Savvy: Really? I kissed you the first time.
Chris: Yes, you did. I asked her about it and if she would say we were dating and she said that it was a distinct possibility.
This isn't the first time he dated someone who didn't kiss him for a few dates. Last I remember, he got tired of it pretty fast. But then he gets tired of all of us pretty fast. That was one of my main concerns with moving forward in the relationship and really getting to the point of building trust with him.
Savvy: So what about the Russian chick?
Chris: Well, it just didn't work out. I guess the age difference and her having a 16-year-old daughter didn't really work.
Savvy: You're as bad as me. No one can keep up with who I'm dating. Even I can't.
We did alot of laughing. We laughed over not being able to fidn the bathroom key and I was almost going to watch the door so he could use the facilities like a secret agent operation, but then they found the key to the men's room. We talked about alot of stuff. In fact, it was the most fun we had together since before he asked me to be his girlfriend, back when he was on his best behavior. There were some really sweet moments with him when he was my boyfriend. I will always cherish those. But I've moved on.
My cousin Lil was concerned.
Lil: He didn't try to get back together with you, did he?
Sav: Oh, no. Besides, I've moved on.
Lil: Good, I mean, i would support you and love you no matter what you decided, but I don't think he's good for you.
Sav: Agreed. There's nothing there for me. It was just fun to meet up with him since I was down there. I'm seeing other people, he's seeing other people, it just isn't there anymore.
Lil: You don't know how happy I am to hear that. He just has too many anger issues.
Sav: I know, I can't forget that. It was scary sometimes.
We said our goodbyes. She doesn't realize it nagged at me the whole time to remember how he felt like he always had to face the door in case something happened. He always had a gun. Always. It was weird. One time he flipped out when he could find his fanny pack to carry his gun with him on a short walk he was taking. He got scary angry then. It's a slightly tolerable oddity in a friend, but not a boyfriend. There's no going back for me, not ever.