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Monday, April 14, 2008

My Thoughts on Polygamy

If polygamy were allowed then maybe men wouldn't be treating us ladies so badly in their eternal quest to find the ONE. I'm starting to be in favor of polygamy because then at least I would know where my man is and I would know and be sister wives with the women. Only the cool, talented ones could be my sister wives!! I would insist on auditioning them for a band or something. Certainly that Canadian chick who plays trombone and I would get along famously. We'd hold hands and sing kumbaya with Bass. We'd harmonize some great standards. Me singing lead, Bass on his bass singing harmony, that chick on her trombone...We're all sooo good looking! Why not have Astro there, too!?

My dating life sucks!!!!!!!

I'm still not over Bass. I don't want him back, but I'm not OVER it. Someone mentioned me looking at his phone. I was thinking about his iphone and being on our date and I froze inside.

Savvy: What? Knots in stomach.
Shell: You know, at the beer tasting.
Savvy: Beer tasting? Bass...
Thunder. Lightning bolts. Bass walking into the room with that girl. I'm completely stymied. He was so mean. My friends saw everything. The humiliation factor...
Oooooooh! Yes! The other guy...the one with the same name. Oh that's so funny. Nervous laughter. I have a joke right now that I only date guys with iphones because Bass had an iphone and Astro does too. Quietly. You can see that it was a big drama with Bass from my reaction. I'll have to call you and tell you all the sordid details sometime.
Shell: Yes, call me. We'll also talk about Astro.
Savvy: K. Sounds good.

I debate whether or not I should call her about that or pretend like I forgot.

I want to break something, like the windows to his house. I'm the first person Bass would suspect. What if I got a baseball and made sure there were no fingerprints...

I don't do it, if that's what you're thinking.


Tairebabs said...

Humm the polygamy thing..you really think that would stop men? I doubt it. Unless of course you are ready to have a hundred sister wives or more. lol.

About breaking the window. I completely understand the feeling. Gosh I sometimes feel like smashing my exs car window. particularly becos I know he loved that car. Haven't done it...yet! lol

SavvyD said...

But I would only accept the cool talented ones. One sour note and it's all over. I'm not going to break anything, just having absurd thoughts. Just glad I'm not alone in my thoughts!