Thursday, April 10, 2008
Slap That Bass!
I wish I had a more devious mind back when I discovered Love is...Like High School. Maybe I was still trying to hang on to things with Bass, compete or win. I don't know why when he had already lied to me. (I Know What You Did Last Night). I wish I had ruined his night. It would have been so easy. Why didn't I think of it before? It would have been so perfect to sit down with him and that Canadian chick and said, "Wow, so, does this mean we aren't dating anymore?" Blink, blink, big doe eyes, tear, sniffle. I remember Natalie Portman in Closer saying See this tear? I want you to take a picture. This is what you did to me. That Canadian chick would have gotten fiery and slapped Bass or something. She would have called a cab and then told all her girlfriends back in Canada what an immense jerk he was and how soundly she had slapped him. She would have been in disbelief that he had done such an awful thing to both of us. Instead, I backed off. There are pictures from that night. My night was ruined. My faith in love was ruined. My heart is still a bit wrecked. Why keep it in? He didn't. Instead of feeling like I was humiliated in front of my friends, I would have humiliated him. Next time, I'm gonna go for the gusto. I'm going to stop being such a nice girl. What's wrong with exacting a little social vengeance? Who says you can't take karma into your own hands? I might still slap him.