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Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Love is...Helping Drunk People

In a grandly unsavvy moment, I cried and didn't eat all day from a migraine, took extra Alleve to kill it, forgot that I was taking muscle relaxers then drank 5 glasses of wine at a progressive dinner. My cheese slid off my cracker in front of Bass and everyone else.

Some friends helped me pick up the pieces.

At a progressive dinner, the men change tables with every course. They also gave us a glass of wine to compliment each course. Bass even complimented me. I had taken extra care to dress up. I wanted to feel great.
Bass: That's a really cute dress. You look nice.
Savvy: Thanks.
Bass: Where's your scarf? You always wear one. I missed it.
Savvy: I'm full of surprises!

Aperitif. Pinot Grigio. Bass took off when I started flirting with Pops who has 2 kids (19 and 14). I met them all at a Thanksgiving party. Pops shared his glass of wine with me, but gave most of it to me when we parted ways to get seats.

1st Course. Durin Tigato white with Calamari. Bass sat a table outside. Whew! I read menu options in Italian to a guy. You can read a menu to me anytime. Wow! That's really sexy!

2nd Course. Cantina Terlano Pinot Bianco with salad. I averted my eyes quickly when I saw Bass walking in my direction. He was at the next table with his back to me. I was on pins and needles.

Intermezzo. Lemon Gelato. Everything was fine up until then. For that course Bass was at my table. I could barely handle it. I excused myself to go to the ladies and catch my breath. The conversation stayed light and amicable after that. At one point he laughed while saying, Yeah, D knows me REALLY well. He took a picture of our group with his phone.

As the men rotated, tears started welling up.
Cheree: Stop it! Don't go there!
Savvy: OK, OK!

3rd Course. Rutherford Ranch Cabernet Sauvignon paired with a strip steak, polenta and asparagus. I regarded the tiny portions carefully. Wow, we're eating elf food! Everyone laughed. I looked at another guy's plate. Hey, no fair! You got more than me. Miss, Miss. He got more than me. Remember how you would do that as a kid?? While I talked to the waitress and my table, Pops stole all of my steak. It was a fun group. When Pops started seeing that I was upset, he wanted to know what was wrong. Our heads were touching and I whispered in his ear.
Savvy: Oh nothing. I just broke things off with someone.
Pops: What an idiot. I never forgot you from when you came to the party at my house.
Savvy: Really? Aww. Thanks.

Then we all ended up laughing about Guy who had invited me to the party and how he had been a Turkey of a Guy.

Pops: I keep hearing you have a beautiful voice. Why don't you sing something? I sang O Babbino Caro from an opera by Puccini. It's a tune you would recognize if you heard it. Others applauded, while Bass's back stiffened slightly. Pops pulled me in close again.
Pops: That was amazing!
Savvy: I'm kinda drunk. I'm going to need to stick around here to sober up before I go home.
Pops: We can walk around the pier.
Savvy: Can I tell you a secret? I was never intimate with Bass.
Pops: That was probably why he broke things off. That's how guys are. I could do things to you that would put a smile on your face for two weeks. You won't even remember who he is.

4th Course Wycliff Sparkling white with dessert. A guy at the table worked near me and we discussed having coffee. I walked past Bass to get my phone. I finished my wine, really liked it, and then finished someone else's.

At that point, my cheese slid off my cracker. The synergistic effect of alchohol with all the medications I was taking hit haaard.

I didn't want to be with Pops. I wanted to be with Bass. I was a little afraid that Pops would try to take advantage of me. I needed to be safe. I couldn't think. Bass never pushed things too far. It couldn't be true. I made a beeline for Bass, leaning on chairs as I walked and sat (crashed) in the seat next to him.

Bill: Savvy, are you OK? Do you need coffee? Let's get you some coffee.
Savvy: Yeah. Coffee.

My coffee came. I put sugar, cream and then I looked at Bass and picked up my coffee.
Savvy: I'm gonna tell you this because I'm drunk enough to. I've had some very interesting offers tonight, but I don't want to be with them. I want to be with you.
Bass: That's so sweet!!

I dropped my coffee, ran outside, sat on a wall and started crying. Bill followed me, so did Bass. He gathered me up and let me sob on his shoulder. I told Bill all about Bass and Pops.
Savvy: I can't believe I said that.
Bill: I know.
Savvy: You mean you heard me?? I thought I said it quietly. I get hit on all the time. Everyone just wants to have sex with me. No one wants to be with me for me. It huuuurts!
Bill: I'm so sorry. I've watched Bass do this to a few girls. He's a total player.

He called Xtina over to tell her about Pops while a crowd gathered. There were 5 guys with the same real name as Pops, so we couldn't do anything. Bill walked me back inside to get more coffee. Bass stood there mutely.
Bill: I got a ride with Cheree or else I would stay with you.
Savvy: I love you, Bill.
Xtina: You and Bass are both to drunk to drive, so we're going to Sharky's to hang out. No fighting you two!
She pointed at each of us and let me hang onto her as we walked to her car.

After the scene I just caused, all I could think was Why me?
As the time ticked by, we made conversation. Bass, Xtina, Albert, Jonas and me.
Xtina: I used to be a nice Catholic girl who went to church all the time.
Savvy: Me too.
Bass: I used to be an altar boy. I can't believe it.
Savvy: Me either...I need to go to the ladies. Hey, that's a picture Emiliano Zapata. Viva la revolucion! My great grandfather was challenged to a dual by Pancho Villa. Thanks God Pancho Villa didn't show up! Mexico lindo y querido!!

Xtina walked me to the bathroom.
Savvy: Wow! The bathroom looks just like where we were yesterday!
Xtina: This IS where we were yesterday.
Savvy: Seriously?

Albert got pitchers of water and bought me a lemonade when I didn't have cash. I sang I Hate Men and So in Love from Kiss Me Kate, Memory from Cats. I know the whole soundtrack. I drunk dialed my exboyfriend. I sang bits of New York, New York that Bass had sung at karaoke.

Xtina and Albert tried to convince me to get a hotel room, but I thought if I waited for one more hour, I would be OK. They left me at my car and I watched Bass slink away in what I named his Jazzmobile. I stayed in the bar after everyone left and mulled over what had happened. I needed to go to the bathroom again.

I regaled the girls in the bathroom with my tale of the evening's woe. A girl passed out in the stall. We tried to wake her because the door was locked. I went to get someone who worked there since I was certain they had dealt with this before. We got her awake, out of there and reunited her with her friends.

As I was walking to my car, my exboyfriend, Chris called to make sure I was OK and talked with me about my evening and our relationship woes.
Sav: Hey thanks for keeping me on the phone until I got home.
C: No problem. That's what I'm here for.

Even though my exboyfriend and I had serious problems, he was still able to show love to me. People went out of their way to help me. I went out of my way to help someone else worse off than me. I don't know what the end result of all of this will be. If C and I can still keep in touch, maybe someday Bass and I can too.

But now I'm also thinking that if I hadn't been quite so intoxicated and just said something to Xtina about Pops, or just sat there and had my coffee, Bass and I would be much better off. Posthangover hindsight is always clearer.


Anonymous said...

Booze can really blur your perspective because of its depressant effects. Take it from someone who knows that all to well (yours truly).

I have made it a policy for myself to stop drinking - or just cut out and leave - if I am in a situation where someone is making me upset.

The first time I did it (dealing with Evil Ex-inator who hasn't gotten over me!) , it was easier than I thought it would be.

Michael Majeski said...

I liked this answer the best. However, I think an even deeper demonstration of love would be Helping Drunk People...even though they won't thank you when their sober. Because, well, sometimes love is just one long desperate, thankless persuit. Although, I must admit, your answer was definately more uplifting than that. I guess you can look at my blog (it's pretty juvenile and overwrought), but even if you don't keep on bloging :)


D said...

I am really thankful to those who stayed. Although, the other girl and her friends didn't seem particularly grateful.