I kissed a man in a kilt while I was in San Francisco!
I was actually kind of sad. Here my cousin was getting married and I was feeling sorry for myself.
A lot of people still seem to tell me that having sex is the way to get a man, my cousins sometimes included in that. It hurts.
I get really upset about it. A group of the younger cousins, and my married cousin Lil who had the night off courtesy of her husband's babysitting went to a bar after the rehearsal dinner. It was supposed to be fun, but I was thinking about what people say about sex and relationships.
Lil: Men just connect differently than women. We should just get over it and move on.
But does moving on mean I have to disconnect my heart and my hopes for marriage? I guess I wouldn't mind so much if I knew that the other relationship parts were going to be there too. But how would you know if it isn't really serious like being engaged or waiting until you get married? There wasn't that concern 100 years ago when men courted women in the drawing room under parental supervision. I'm already not a virgin. I did sleep with one guy, but that was a long time ago. I want the next guy to be the only guy. I started crying a little. I had the perfect excuse, My contacts are really bothering me. I ought to take them out, huh?
Lil: Hey, listen, if a guy isn't going to stick around after a few dates, he isn't worth it. Move on. He's not ready and he's not the right person.
Even her husband told me once, Yeah, sex is great, but there's so much more to a marriage than just that. But sex is great, you should just do it. He then apologized for offending me.
I took my contacts out and managed to smile and laugh. I could barely manage champagne or margaritas because of the recent memory of my plastered state in front of Bass on Monday. Finally we decided to pay out and leave. On my way out with Lil, my heart stopped:
Savvy: Wow! A man in a kilt. You should be careful being in San Francisco. Watch out for those boys!
Simon: I'll be OK, I've got my knife.
Savvy: Yes, you also have really nice legs.
Simon: Why thank you.
Savvy: It woud really make my night to kiss a man in a kilt.
Simon: Really? He laughed easily. OK
Savvy: Great! He put his hand on my waist.
Simon: I'm Simon. What's your name? He looked straight into my eyes. He was quite attractive.
Savvy: D. Oh, I thought we;d just kiss on the cheek, but yes, we should at least know each others names.
We both leaned forward and touched our lips tenderly. It was sweet.
Savvy: Thanks. You really made my day. My night, I mean.
Simon: You're welcome!
I bounded out of the bar while Lil waited outside.
Sav: Didn't you see?
Lil: See what? I'm soo cold.
Sav: I kissed that guy in the kilt!
Lil: You did? He's probably gay.
Sav: Oh? We aren't in the Casto. (the Gay neighborhood.) My cousin A She took me to a diner in the Castro called Orphan Andy's to people watch. We got an eyeful. Even she got a little tripped out by this really butch black construction worker looking guy was flirting with an also tough looking Latino guy while we ate dinner--and she LIVES here, though I have visited alot.
Lil: Honey, this is San Francisco. The whole city is the Castro.
Sav: I don't care, I laughed. Now Bass isn't the last person I kissed. I'm happy. I kissed a guy in a kilt! I don't care if he was gay. He was hot! Are you going to San Francisco, put a flower in your hair! Summertime will be a lovin time! I left my heart in San Francisco!
I was practically skipping down the street singing. I do that sometimes. Lil was laughing at me and singing along.
You're so crazy. Put a flower in your hair.
Yet another cousin was surprised he didn't ask for my phone number. I guess we both knew it wasn't about that.
I'm so confused. I don't understand myself. One minute I'm lamenting deep things, the next I'm Frisky in Frisco.