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Friday, January 11, 2008

Werk Sux

I had the kind of horrible day at work that makes me think of switching careers from teaching to one where I can wear a cute little suit and stylish pumps.

I keep thinking that I will be happier wearing a little suit and pumps, coming into the office, having meetings, gossipping by the water cooler and going out to lunch with my friends. That just sounds like fun!

I'd wear really cute outfits or suits, Gucci shoes and bring a briefcase. I'd have a laptop and a Blackberry.

My perfume would be called "Success." Or maybe, "Power." Or maybe just "Woman."

I would look in the mirror each morning and say, "I am woman, hear me roar." Or maybe, "I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never never let you forget you're a man."

My boss would totally love me and I would get promoted alot.

I'd be living with my childhood best friend in a condo that looks like a Barbie Dreamhouse. Or we'd both be married and living next door to each other. We'd be blissfully happy with our husbands or boyfriends. If we had children, they'd be perfectly behaved bestfriends to each other who called us "Auntie."

Instead, I am dealing with crappy, rebellious teenagers who lie, are manipulative and snot off to me. I'm exhausted all the time. My doctor doesn't wonder why I get sick all the time because she says, "You work in a cesspool. Children are magnets for disease." My bosses are sometimes totally critical and completely unsupportive. They expect me to volunteer my time. I have to miss a cruise with my boyfriend to meet with the mayor of our city on Saturday. I can't get my money back so now he is trying to find someone else to go with him. I wonder if this is going to break us up.

I'm too worn out to dress cute all the time now. I can't wear some of the nice jewelry I've bought for myself because it makes me uncomfortable when the children admire it. "Wow, that's pretty. Can I have it?" asked one student. When I wore my adorable aqua high heels, I sprained my ankle and ended up in a boot. Sprained Ankle Adventures / Sprained Ankle Adventures 2.

My car has been tagged. I'd like to find SMCK and teach him a lesson. I've been left unflattering graffiti and detention slips filled out in special and disgusting ways. Apparently I'm a "sh-tty teacher" who sucks too much d-ck.

I'm overwhelmed. Meetings turn into outright attacks on my character and reputation. My boss doesn't appreciate me. Oh heck, bosses! And communacation between principals and vice principals is not that great.

Needless to say, I'm in the market for a new job. Hopefully one where I can wear a cute suit and stylish pumps. That would make feel better, at least until my first review.

1 comment:

single/certain said...

you're letting your crappy boss/job bully you into missing your cruise!??! wtf?! what is wrong with you? girl, you've had these plans for a while now.... don't let this happen. it's just the mayor. seriously. put your priorities in line and go on the cruise! i seriously doubt they'll fire you.